Musical Life of Hushgirl

So a friend of mine texted me and asked me a very simple but very disturbing question. She asked why we stopped being closed.. Lyke we never ever closed before.  I didnt answer the question... I went to sleep. But you may guess, i couldnt sleep. The next morning i answered her question. We spent half of the day talked and shared each other updates.. Though i dont have anything much to say. Couple of days back, L was still in town and told me that she would be back to JB for good. She wanted to see me. You know, i dont have much friends... Theres nothing wrong with me but i have this paranoia of getting too close and one day they will go.. So i dun keep myself to close.. In fact i dont keep in touch.  But they do.. Maybe im special.  Amy - sleep now, catch the sun later. Good Morning.

So you know how sucks is MTV nowadays n how rarely we all watch it now... Thanks to youtube obviously.. Somehow my sis duk recommend this show called Catfish the show or the series.. I cant remember n not feeling to google it.  I knew the term catfish when it was featured in gLee. And i never know how serious this catfish thingy. Thot it just for fun n stuff. Last nite was reading about this selangor footballer with his catfish. It was pretty interesting! So how dangerous it is to put your picture all over the net .. Some people may create a fake acct n start talking to you. Pretty scary huh..  xoxo  Amy

To sn00kiz if you read this n forgive me pls gimme a call. I miss you.  Xoxo  Amy

So i was out to the mall today to get my dreamy pink Timberland boots. Went to the haus and it was out of stock. So i went to check out at the Metrojaya, cuz i know there was a timberland section in gents floor.  So i went in and the guys was ok, greeting n smiling and i smiled back. And the big fat bald malay guy who was behind the cash register machine was saying something like asking his co-worker what if a girl like me to be his gf. And i was like what?! But i ignored them. I think the other guy was just smiling and the fat one added... Tanak kan? Memilihhhhh... Means, sure u dont want her, choosy.  I was somekinda of cuz im hurt. What did he think i am.. I know now that i should look at him in they eye.. But u know i totally ignored them and went to my dad who was browsing the shirts. I finally went out and gave him a very sharp stare n a very emo look.  Somehow, of cuz they were talking about me... There was no one there... Even though its not direct meaning as what...

Loving my black lace.... Can i wear it on morning raya... Is it really mourning then? Omg this is not a wordless wednesday!

That was the phrase from Lord of the Rings - Return of The King. It was keep looping in my ears on and on and on these days. Starts when i was sick the first week of Ramadhan. Maybe i was being overdramatically about it ... I felt i were to die... And that would make my parents so sad cuz they already lose their child... My older sister, back in 1990. Since my grandma back from the hospital last May, she was staying with us until now. I mean at my parents house. Her condition when she was in the hospital was critical. It was very fortunate that she survived when everyone were sort of ready for any bad news. Alhamdulillah she is getting better now.  But you know, its when Allah want things happened it is kun fa ya kun. I dont know how to make it into a nice statement but jodoh, ajal is Allah's secrets .... Its already written down.. And when He wants it to happen... It will happen.  So last Saturday, i was watching Skyfall on Fox. Called my mom in the middle of the movie, i for...

No its supposed to be - what a 2 days! So lets do it diary style.  Thursday 25 July 2013 11:45 am - I was testing and amending my program .. It was some kinda oracle form that I need to enhance. I kinda get the idea how to make it right. And was really in the mood to correct it. Suddenly the monitor went blank and the pc just stopped. Lights off and air nod sound went off as well. It's was a power trip. The first thing came out of my lips was - shit I haven't save it yet! 12:15 am - most non Muslim colleagues went out for lunch and me and cyan loitering around the office. The air was still cool and nice but the place was kinda dark we decided to hang out beside the window and feast our eyes with pool scenery of suasana sentral. 02:00 pm - ms Wong of HR came down and announced that the power failure was major and the rectification would take like 2,3 hours so the best thing is that we could all go home. Unless for some staff that have urgent task and have their laptop with them,...

Last Ramadhan was nearly perfect. I had this and that... Things maybe I should not mention anymore but yes it was perfect ... Thot that was the best Ramadhan ever. Ok but Syawal was bitter and I dun really hope for the best this Ramadhan. But I thought things would just be okay you know. Unlike last Ramadhan, I spent most of Iftar alone. I dun really mind though.. iFtar wasn't a feast. Just breaking fast... Maybe I just don't get it anymore.. But yea I was fine. I dun feel like writing anymore...

Totally inseparable! Sent from my iPad

Something in the way he woos me... Somewhere in his smile he knows... You're asking me will my love grow I don't know I don't know  Something in the way he moves Attracts me like no other lovers ........ It's really sucks to miss someone you know You can't never have him... Xoxo Amy

This is hard.... I never thought I would post a very sad entry like this at times like this. Even though this particular person was someone I never met or even talk or you know physically attached but he was someone that deserve a moment of silent from me as I heard the news, he passed away. Rest in Peace, Cory Monteith. You were always Finn to me, I admitted when all girls went gaga on Puck  during the 1st season of gLee, you were my all time favorite character ... I admit that.. The best part was when you were still active in football and were this stuck up famous quarterback .. A high school hero but inside you have  this sweet loving character shown through the period in gLee club and really dig 70's 80's rock songs! Of coz I was a gLeek  and will alwiz be damn I can't imagine what's the next season without Finn. This is not just a termination of a character but the real man is dead :( how devastated is that? And I know he was the same guy in his famous character......

Made With Paper Sent from my iPad

.. wordless .. xoxo Amylia not so juicy

I got am Instagram hihi finally right ! I want my usual hushgirl as the ID but I was too late. So I decided to create a new nick and its Amy kuzo. Kuzo was taken from Nabil creative side. He's such an inspirational character .... Anyway I have no idea how to paste the Instagram link here...  Hahaha maybe later ill edit this post on my laptop ;) http://instagram.com/amykuzo/ Xoxo - fat Amy

Last Sunday like usual if i were alone at home I usually have my Sunday nite movie and last Sunday I watched this modern edge kinda like independent romantic film called 'Like Crazy'. It was set in LA and ( it's already sad ..) it was about this American Guy and a Brit girl. I love it since the girl made the first move. She left the note...love letter actually on the guy's car and they guy didn't freak out indeed they actually went out on a date. You should see how cute the Brit girl when she blushed. She was like blushing all the time on their 1st date. And of course, they had the chemistry right away.. They're like soul mates. Well to cut the things short, they ended up separated because of the visa and they both were LDR paranoids. It seems like when they're physically distant, the feeling were distant too. But through out the years and times, they knew they couldn't live without each other...they would at last met up and break up few times. They even...

Nothing can cure a broken heart No one can replace a pure soul No money in the world can buy The happiness.... But money gave the hushgirl a chance to turn her world upside down I never like the Apple. Maybe cuz I wanted that big colorful iMac before and dad didn't buy it for me cuz I was in my IT degree and we used windows all the time. He said Mac would just waste his money. So I was like no Apple for like. When my man changed his blackberry to iPhone, I grew up on liking the Apple. Still not gonna buy one ..  But I love to see him use it. It looked pretty cool. When Nabil used blackberry I changed my old Sony Ericsson to blackberry. And still using it till today. When iPad was around I felt like buying since galaxy tab was not so nice.. But the old iPad was bulky. And of course when iPad mini was out.. I felt like ok this is it. I was like - I'm gonna pop this Apple! And here we are ;) together forever. Hushgirl and her first Apple, Mr Marlon. Xoxo - Amylia 

you know during the time, life really struck you and you felt like 'why is this happening to me'.. like over and over again.. till you feel like you are now understand why people commit suicide, its just that there was the time you feel like enough is enough. its really painful, death could just stop it. i have a friend, years back.. she was in deep shit and everyday she talked about committing suicide. as i tried to digest on why would she think like that, i knew I would never understand cuz i wasnt in her shoes. sadly now i understand why. xoxo - amy

go away please. cuz I heard Smashing Pumpkins is coming to town and that will be my 1st Sp concert and I know I am not goin cuz I made my mind not to go to concert anymore but I really wanna go. Its Smashing Pumpkins and you know me, I love Smashing Pumpkins, no it is not love it is more than that but I know I will not go cuz not only I made that stupid decision, cuz most of my Smashing Pumpkins kaki are all married and at least have their own partner and nobody wanna go with me. This is just like the Jamiroquai tragedy. I hate it. I hate my life and I hate myself. Oh, I have a cute CEO. I have crush on him. im NOT okay. xAMYx

2013 - I've got my first Marc :) Excuse for the messy room, if you noticed.. Ive like too much of clothes and no where to put them :P  O yea, too many clothes, still confuse what to wear  Normal la =)  I missed my EOS too much.. havent snapped around for a while.. That was I snapped last Saturday.. since that was something I get excited about :) Just love my new bag.. My first Marc of many of them to come. Amin.  The day wasnt so sunny for more pictures to snap. It was a hazy weekend, and seriously hot. On Sunday the day wasnt really sunny too.. I missed to shoot the sun rays n stuff..  Letting my hair looks golden in the pics.. =)  Somehow managed to create a good series of photos - named it as Morning View. Inspired by Incubus of course, along with the Are You In live version on YouTube, looping for hundreds time. Shared with the special one. Ohh lapar.  xoxo Amy

its 0322 hours. i was making a very bad decision. my body was kinda sick n tired, extra long hours of working everyday.. yea i know. but craving for macchiato made me detoured to sooka sentral's starbucks. had caramel macchiato to go, drank it after dinner around 9pm. body was tired, slept at 10. malam masih muda , they says.. 0232 wake up... couldnt sleep. watching this.. the face im longing for. and i dont expect people will understand me... love, Amylia

xoxo Amylia

today I heard something that I have been longing to hear thought it may not be true or sincere who am I to doubt but even if its true or even sincere it may not changing what I am now or will it? im just glad that, he tried. that shows sincerity. love, Amy

Should I start with "what a weekend?" But I found it negative so I am not gonna use that. So, let start over. I always, though I actually feeling like in denial, I realize that I avoid to be a grown up. I refused to drive here and there - I basically still relying on my parents to drive me around, I never work in a place for more than 5 years, basically I am a commitment freak kinda person I guess? No, I am not sure, I never been in a serious relationship before, getting things serious always scare the hell of me. Yea, I guess? Actually, I always thought that I would grow up after I settled down. Like most people I know. They were childish before, still am.. but of course marriages mature them. I think I would be like them, someday.  But I didnt realize that clock ticking, people grows older and my parents getting older, I think I need to grow up. By myself.  Last Saturday I drove back to my hometown for the voting responsibility, well, Done my part now. I...

*smile* I managed to to survive the First of May with no dramatic feeling. Or should I say, I didnt cry. This morning I were walking to the Market and I was thinking I need to blog. Not only cuz I have no ears listen to me now, ( yes my stories arent interesting ) but somehow, I feel like cuz today is First of May. If someone can officially move on on this date, why cant I? So I was thinking of why am I gonna blog then. And I have some pretty nasty idea. It wasnt myself, but maybe some part of me hiding. I know that I could say mean things, ( of cuz it will be meaner cuz people wont expect it from me, sweet little Amy ) that is why I always keep quiet and smile. and that is why orang pijak2 u, Amy. The Market made me happy, I didnt buy much but I got nasi lemak ( it wasnt really nice btw ) On the way back, I thought of the happy sweet little things I would blog later. But I didnt .. up until now. I had my nasi lemak with Abg Tony, was watching back the first Iron Man movi...

Close your eyes and ill kiss you, tomorrow ill miss you, remember that ill always be true... Ax