Musical Life of Hushgirl

I dont want to say goodbye I can see the fear inside your eyes It's so hard to walk away I know that this feels like the end Life never seems to let you win But I'll be back someday I'm already missing you But I'm not even gone In time we'll be together again And it won't be long Now everything goes up and down And the world keeps spinning round and round And still you're waiting there I'll try to make it another night And dream of you when I close my eyes Cause I'll be back someday I'm already missing you But I'm not even gone In time we'll be together again And it won't be long Just hold it in Dont let it go You'll always live Inside my soul Hushgirl currently listening to : Missing You by Big Dismal

no idea to write.  Happy Independence Day Malaysia.  I love You. Hushgirl currently listening to : -

Last nite, around midnite I fell asleep. Then I awake from my sleep.. its not really a deep sleep.. but I was awake quite in shock.. like a spasm. And directly I looked at my dear not asleep laptop. My laptop was awake all the time cuz I was downloading K-on soundtrack :D "My Love is Like a Stapler" heheh  So I saw Nabil ym msg blinking on my taskbar. I checked the message. He asked if I were sleeping. I checked the timestamp. Nabil's intention to wake me up took around 18 minutes. Maybe cuz he's in JB. So its a bit far hehe But its a good chemistry though, I always had this thing if I were with the guys I hold them close to my heart. Not just special boyfriend, but regular boyfriend too.. and sometimes girlfriend. Like few years ago, I was sleeping .. around 3 am I awake and suddenly an SMS came right in my phone. It was Fairuz, my old friend.. Its the chemistry Amy. Chemistry. Anyway, didnt talk much with Nabil last nite. Few FAQs. I asked him more I think. Abou...

Iftar  ( Arabic :  إفطار ‎), refers to the  evening meal  when  Muslims  break their fast during the  Islamic month  of  Ramadan . Iftar is one of the  religious observances of Ramadan  and is often done as a community, with people gathering to break their  fast  together. Iftar is done right after  Maghrib (sunset) time. Traditionally, a  date  is the first thing to be consumed when the fast is broken (this is taken from Wikipedia ) @Puti Bungsu, KL captured by Canon Ixus 130 I have yet to develop the css for the quotation thingy but I really need to quote things as I really dont have mood to create my original sentence. Malas! Ala Melayu kan Malas. ok maybe its just me. Anyway, this is a post on Iftar. Its been 3 weeks of Ramadhan. So much things happened.. and yes it was fast. Time flies fast nowadays. How fast! God's speed. Well, nvm. hmm The 1st and 2nd week of Ramadhan were okay with...

I finally found my emo cure. One night I was staying home alone and not doin any good. I decided to karaokeplay.com So I browsed few songs and sang. I was terrible.. And I remembered to sing Alanis Morissette - You oughta Know.. ( the best cure for an itch :D ) But I saw this.. Uninvited song. I used to love this song.. no, no.. I was crazy for this song. So I sang.. and it cracked out the funny side of me. I cant have her notes! It was beyond terrible.. I was giggling. Happy. It was funny. But the orchestral was so intense like my love life and I was there, lost and high. When the mood was ok, I sang Head over Feet. To feel love again. But its not love. It was something fun and unReal. But I dedicated to the right person. I hope. but tonite, felt like listening to Uninvited again.. yes, I love my love life, eventhough it sucks. Tutie, marilah karok lagu ni =) Hushgirl currently listening to : Uninvited by Alanis Morissette

i'm so glad and very merely my fourth will cure the laziest self of weary the huge sea of shore so far your nearness reaches  a lucky fifth of you turn people into eachs and cowards into grow our can'ts were born to happen our most have died in more our twentieth will open wide a wide open door we are so both and oneful night cannot be so sky sky cannot be so sunful i am through you so i (~ Edward Estlin Cummings ~ ) malam ni tengok langit ada apa? ada bulan ....................... yes, bulan.. cantik tapi bulan sepi.. Hushgirl currently listening to : no music. enjoying some Quranic verses.

 Precious Old China Cafe, Central Market captured by Sony Cybershot. Friday evening we've been drinking 2 AM I swear I might propose but we close the tab split a cab and call each other up when we get home falling asleep  to the sound of sirens... Hushgirl currently listening to : same song :)

{ this post is a tribute to my one and only John Mayer } OMG I feel like im in love. Today I got home and first thing that I did after throwing my bag on the bed was, played the John Mayer cd. Ahh!!! Its like you get home to someone. For me its JOHN MAYER! if I were in NY, this is the kinda New Yorker I would go gaga with. my gtalk status today is super kawaii!!! yes.. now my love is only for this 3 kids and my cats. =) owh yeah my Mama, my Babah, my Wans, my adik2, my kakak2, my kawan2, my Starbucks barista and my Dutch Lady Chocolate Milk. owh im late! edited version : Past midnite. I didnt actually realized it was this hours until Nabil asked me why I still up. Anyway, I was late just now cuz Nana said she wud get out of her home like 2015. I was chatting with Wana till I saw it was 2020. So I hurriedly went down with my yesterday's tee and my spongebob pijamas :D We were out to deliever some kueh. Ended up getting my cravingly DL Choc Milk in Tesco Ampang .. well, ...

Polarized Faces  i was listening to Neon while editing this thing.. but then I listened to City Love and had it on loop until now. Such a beautiful song. Such a Big Apple theme song. I love NY love story. Just like in this song. i tell everyone i smiled just because i got city love i found it in Lydia and i cant remember life before her name so so beautiful... how can someone who wrote this beautiful piece still be alone and lonely? Marry me, Mr Mayer. Love is beautiful with the right person isn't it? Always have some faith... Right back at you. this one he craps a little, but still a good version of this song. hear it.. he has a voice of an angel... my lullaby tonite. Hushgirl currently listening to : City Love John Mayer Room for Squares

just cant do anything,... cant feel anything :( Love supposed to be beautiful... :( Hushgirl currently listening to : True Ryan Cabrera

This could be a quick recovery I must say. Honestly its not. Maybe its me in denial, maybe I just wanna quit to feel anything, maybe cuz I just had my mom scolded me on the phone just now. It's a quite 'waking up call'. Anyway, toldcha that if Nabil was there, I were to be slapped. It came through though. One question after another, if you get hurt, you must talk to hati kering people. You'd be okay. ... ok, says Who? But Nabil was correct, I was too excited. I was bad in judgement, I was too nice.. I was too emotional. All in all, in the fact that the one is a jerk, I was the one to blame. And its not worth at all to hurt myself.  I guess.. if you wanna be consoled emotionally and bitch about the Monster, you go to your gfs. Else... whats bfs are for. So.. life like this. I am this grateful to have my friends there for me. I am. Syukran. Time to get up, face reality. Throw all the stuff, change bed spread, sterilize the room. First thing is Done. Ive chan...

Aku paling kasihan lihat diriku di cermin hari ini Mataku merah, hidungku merah, bibirku merah Sempat juga aku lihat Bibirku yang .... cantik Dress favorite aku sarungkan hari ini Peneman hati lara.. namun tak jadi apa, dress is still a dress Rambutku kayak perempuan di rumah sakit jiwa! Apa aku sakit jiwa? Rupaku kosong.. fikiranku kosong The whole day I was in my bed Jika tidak tidur aku lihat kata kata nya, foto fotonya.. Seperti dia ada di sisi Dengan lembut katanya, manis senyumannya.. indah Cintanya Ternyata Cinta itu Bahagia.. Cinta itu jua Derita Aku pilih derita... Nana was there Tutie was there Nadiah was there Uncle was there Zai was there Baby was there and Nabil too.. finally. Syukran, Nabil. you received my inner calls when I need you the most Aku tak punyai ramai teman Namun aku ada bila aku memerlukan mereka Kata - kata semangat, kata - kata positive. Nana never lost her temper if Nabil, mau aku dilempangi.. Aku dah separuh nyawa, Na I...

Tak semestinya ku merasa sepi Kau dan aku ditempat berbeda Seribu satu alasan Melemahkan tubuh ini Aku disini mengingat dirimu Ku menangis tanpa air mata Bagai bintang tak bersinar Redup hati ini Dan ku mengerti sekarang Ternyata kita menyatu Di dalam kasih yang suci Ku akui kamulah cintaku Dan ku mengerti sekarang Ternyata kita menyatu Di dalam kasih yang suci Ku akui kamulah cinta terakhir Kudos : gudanglagu.com Hushgirl currently listening to : Cinta Terakhir Gigi

for you. The first time I saw you through my window, you were on your bike and parked it. I knew you were the one I wanna live with, grow old with, be the man in the house and Imam to my family.  I had been with few guys since I got the keys, but frankly you are my first true love. And the love was so different, I wanted you to be in my family. However, not everything that we dream of could be real. The day I lost you, was the day I knew how much I love you. maybe I never showed it before, maybe I looked cold, maybe I didnt smile so much but with you was the happiest moment of my life. Having to live without you then taught me that its really hurt when we miss someone. Tears was cheap and heartache was a friend of mine. As years went by, I decided to let you go. I let go of the hope. And there you were, I saw you back. What a small world God created, with over 1 mill of people in KL I saw you. Stood there very closed to me. Just couldnt believe my eyes. When the love is dea...

so sekejap this happiness... sad again :( Hushgirl currently listening to : img song artiste album

Heyya =) Have you read the last entry that I said Marriage is sucks? I wish to TAKE it back! Last nite, when I was goin to sleep, I asked God for some guidance. And in my dream I dreamed of me and my little daughter.. a toddler. Very cute like my face when I was little. And lyke usual... I dont know whos the father is. But.. he wore specs! =) Feel kinda good today. I know my day will come. Amin Till then,  the next entry would be all about my EOS thingy. guess what song on my random playlist? :) Hushgirl currently listening to : Your Body is Wonderland John Mayer

Last night, I heard something unpleasant from my cousin's mouth. Tried not to actually think about it but it kinda bothers me. It still is, maybe I need to pour about it to someone. Maybe it just got to be poured down to the drain? Whichever simpler..? Its funny when the spoiled still bothering my Uncle Man eventhough he is having his dating session. I was lyke, 'Lets make her jealous so we will know if she is into you or whut'. Its No Thank You then. He said, the lady knows about me. Whoa.. am i so that VIP? :D but its funny though that I got my new Auntie Man :D Baby is super workaholic nowadays making the old Cougartown as sepi as Ghosttown.  (I actually hate to talk about other people in my blog)  Today,  I had my menses since yesterday. Today considered the first day and its pale me out and kinda make my sourface and all.. My boss noticed and asked whats bothering me. I wish I could tell him off.. "I am having a period pain and this is not usual.." b...

i dreamt of seeing a big big snake last nite and it makes me run the whole field. this is what it means. If you are afraid of the snake, then it signifies your fears of sex, intimacy or commitment. pandai kan? Hushgirl currently listening to : Forgiven Within Temptation

just cant stop being myself. and plz love me for me. MYSELF! Hushgirl currently listening to : SevenDaysInSunnyJune Jamiroquai Dynamite

Heyya. After sahur this morning, I sang "We are the Champion" song while cleaning the dishes. My brother sang a long and my sister nagged and asked why I sang that particular song. I said cuz today is Monday! Am so not in the mood to go to office today. Though I have to cuz my 1st auto debit program starts today. :) Although its a clone version of the current auto debit program and most of the table design and stuff were done by me. Excellent! Hope things are goin to be great. I am actually sleepy. I couldnt really sleep last nite. Back from the Academy, my heart did feeling uneasy. I hope I knew whats goin on. But I just tried to ignore it.. maybe cuz the night before I talked to Nabil and kinda told him off everything. The very thing I scared of. I hope he understands though. Whatever for the improvement, things are different now. I am content with my life now, I just need whatever I have now. and maybe thats why I felt different yesterday, maybe my heart knew tha...

Another entry on early morning and its Sunday, baby. Wake up!!! Kiss! Kiss! ooopsss!!.. Its puasa day. =) After sahur this morning, my sis surfed her fb like usual and her friend posted a vampire video. Which was found just beside highway. Its pretty clear though.. the long hair, the white long dress.. its wandering along the road.. and flew up. not really flew.. its more like elevated up. huhu I dont wanna comment much, it happened to be on the highway I used a lot! Waaaaaa!!! I am nearly forgotten that Im goin to have my 1st Canon Workshop today in KLCC. Yeeeppss.. just felt like joining the class cuz I am bad in reading manual. ( im good in reading map anyway :D ) So its gonna started at 9 am to 12 noon. Goin by train and my parents will pick me up later. Felt like goin to my Sunday tuition class. Yikes.. when will I ever be a grown up.. isk. Owh yea and then will go and shop for Baju Raya :D Any nice color for this year.. why not purple? I never had purple baju raya.. ( liar...

The best way about Ramadhan is that I have some moment between sahur and Subuh to blog. And this hour usually my mind is really fresh and everything seems emo-less. Anyway, excuse on the emotional entries below, those were just nightmares now. If tak emo, its not Amy. :)  But this time around, it might be cuz of my PMS.. the 10 days thingy before 'Aunt Irma coming to town.' So, how do we begin? Ramadhan was so far okay, havent been the new person I almost be, turned out life's pretty messy.. what's not good for you might be tempting and comforting you cannot say No to. So that's it. All in all, its getting there I hope. Food wise, well... huhu.. ( Stigma of the Wind kinda bothering my blogging moments now .. im losing my idea) So maybe tbc then. OMG did u know that I have written the whole paragraph then my stupid Google Chrome crashed and its not even saved!! am switching to Mozilla. Back to Mozilla now. Sigh.. I would really missed the cool history...

Kidding, right? Hushgirl currently listening to : -

when GG talked with other girl on the phone, I dislike that feeling of jealousy . when GG hugged me to sleep, I knew I have  him for me alone. still I dislike this feeling of  jealousy . anyway, I just love this song.. will get the cd later. Color my heart   Colour my heart   Make it restart   Make it restart   Color my heart   I want it more than I ever knew   Hushgirl currently listening to : The Blackest Lily Corinne Bailey Rae The Sea

i'm getting there.. i'm losing my appetite.. but hey, wait tonight :D anyway, other than that.. everything is disbeliefs . Hushgirl currently listening to : Heartbreak Warfare John Mayer

:) love, Amylia

after 3 days of downloading the movie, its finally completed. I just cant wait to be emo emo tonite. its okay.. tomorrow I will be fine. ..am looking for that feeling.. i hope it still stays there.. Hushgirl currently watching  : Ada Apa Dengan Cinta

why is it so hard for you to be nice to me? cuz im not the one, is it? Hushgirl currently listening to : -

I think its really been a while since I do blog on the emotional stuff, except the previous post ;) I mean, ok Morrissey is emo but not as emo as me, myself. Nabil did online few nights before, it startled me though cuz I thought I wont talk to him anymore. But rather than feeling happy to see him, I dun feel anything anyway. I think cuz we're too far from each other now. He said I sound happy. I have no idea why he thinks that way, maybe its a tricky statement. That night I was missing my man, but I didnt feel like sharing the feelings with him. We talked about general stuff, feeling-less. I told him I was busy watching Twenty-Ten World Cup and he said, You watching WC? Kidding right? =) I have no idea if he can actually see my Avatar with me in my Spain Jersey. Doesnt matter.. but I think what he felt was right. Maybe I was happy, I was content with my life. I certainly know who I love, who I wanna be with and I simply taking the risk now. Though I dont hope much, but .....

You could have told me at the right time You could have introduced me proudly Never need to have to kiss me Never need to ever touch me But you should have been nice to me You should have been nice to me It would have been so easy And on the moments when I was down You could have been there, you could have been there You could have once just spoke in favor You'd never need to ever touch me But you should have been nice to me You should have been nice to me It wouldn't cost you money And on the moments when I fell down Not for you to say, oh, I told you so You could have waited, you could have waited You could have waited ~ i know id be depressed if i listen to this Morrissey guy.. doomed..... ~

my love life is unFair :(

cant wait to get home to my 4 favorite girls! pic from  http://blog.sanriotown.co.id/ Hushgirl currently listening to : img song artiste album

I wish I had an easier day.. Today was tough. But I am not gonna blog about my day.. It will be about the fucking awesome month of July! The Joyous July. First and foremost, It wasnt all month happy.. Things happened, people go. RIP to my old skoolmate.. May God speed with him. Guys! Guys! Guys! What is World Cup without hot guys? I know its typical but hey.. Its normal la kan.. furthermore, I am not a real kaki bola, but anyway managed not to miss any match after the Part 2. Well, maybe cuz Nana is in town, so I got 1 kaki..  ;) and Uncle Man also so rajin to update me about bola.. so why not!. 5 am breakfast in McD after Netherlands won on Semi. my pick was Spain and yes we WON big time, darling Alonso! Jalan - Jalan! Not so much, but it was PD (and I am not gonna talk about it..) and Bukit Tinggi Colmar Tropicale. Bukit Tinggi was when Nana was following me back to Bentong and that Saturday evening was actually planning to go to Janda Baik, but then it was kinda ...

let me sleep first,.. i'd wake up at 4 am to Blog. me Promise. Hushgirl currently listening to : -